Posts Tagged “Small Business Coaching”

What Is A Life Purpose, Really?

Like many of the personal development terms that have become common in our vernacular, life purpose is something that many people talk about and feel they should have and often times wonder how they would know if they had it.

While some people might think of life purpose in terms of fate or destiny, I prefer to think of it in terms of the expression of your whole self. In other words it is less important that we know it and more important that we are it.

In truth that is a little bit of a stretch, there is no way for us not to be our purpose. However, we can feel more or less connection and pleasure from it. And, that is the reason for us to “find” our life purpose.

In my Make It Happen Guide, I write, “Whatever you want or dream of you can have it. It is in you. You are the one you have been waiting for.” One of the problems with life purpose is that people go looking for it. Then because they are looking for it they feel perpetually disconnected from it. It becomes something beyond themselves that they must find instead of a natural expression of who they are.

So, connecting with your life purpose is really about connecting the deeper and truer aspect of who you are and to do that you can do the following.

• Pay attention to where you feel connected, excited, passionate, of positive. These are clues to deeper truths about yourself and therefore your life purpose. Do more of what makes your feel good.
• What if bad things make you feel good? Sometimes people get stuck because what they feel they want to do is destructive or negative. If you feel this way, you might say, “if I did what I wanted to all the time then I would ____.” Fill in the blank with some negative outcome. But even your negative pleasure can lead you in the right direction if you approach it in the right way.
• Honor your dreams. They are with you for a reason. The hints that you get along the way from your fantasies can profoundly connect you to yourself and your purpose.
• Your purpose is not necessary a vocation. But, it may be able to be turned into one. Think less about what work you want to do in the world and more about what kind of impact you want to have or what kind of contribution you want to make.

I love this topic of life purpose and I look forward to talking with you about it more on my weekly radio show, Real Answers this week.

Finding Happiness In The Day To Day

I have to be honest about how I typically deal with my distaste for winter – I get the heck out and go somewhere warm!  While I will be making some trips to warmer climates this winter, I still try to find ways to be happier and more at peace when I find myself wishing I had three jackets on instead of only one. This – and any situation that makes us uncomfortable – is a great chance to reflect on how to find happiness with what IS rather than seeking to change our situation.

Of course, when we have the power to change our circumstances for the better, I believe we should take it (i.e. hit the beach in some tropical destinations for some fun and sun).  But, sometimes what we are experiencing in life is beyond our control –just like the weather.  When that is the case, the only thing that we have control over is ourselves – our thoughts, emotions and actions.  Here are 5 ways to cultivate happiness in your day to day life, no matter what comes your way.

1. Start Positive – The first few moments of your day make a real imprint on how the rest of it goes.  Start with a moment to be quiet, an affirmation, journaling or any other way that helps you start your day centered and focused.

2. Look For It – What you focus on gets bigger.  Unfortunately, we often focus on what makes us unhappy rather than the things that make our day better.  Make an effort to recognize what is going well and what you do enjoy.


3. Be Clear On What Makes You Happy – This may seem like a no brainer but it is actually something that we overlook.  What most brings you pleasure and happiness?  Alone time or social time?  A good home cooked meal or enjoying take out and a movie?  Becoming conscious of the things you most enjoy means that you will choose them more often.


4. Say “Thank You” – Whether it be to yourself, your partner, your child or a co-worker.  Express your gratitude for what is working as often as possible.  Expressing your appreciation will immediately make you and the other person feel more positive.  It also reinforces the liked behavior so that you are more likely to see more of it.


5. Slow Down – Slow down and savor the good parts of your life.  Pay attention when you are eating something delicious or really listen when talking to a friend.  Or take the time to notice what is around you on your daily walk or drive.  The more you can be present with your 5 senses and what you are experiencing, the better.


Life is always a mix of things.  No matter how bad a day seems, there is always something there that is positive as well.  Using the list above will help you to collect the good out the simple, daily events of your life and can drastically increase your happiness.

What to hear more on this topic? Join Dr. Kate on her weekly radio show Real Answers, Thursdays at 12pm EST. This week she will be further discussing how to find (and stay!) happy in the day to day.

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